{"id":58,"date":"2013-12-02T16:54:00","date_gmt":"2013-12-02T16:54:00","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/mekesbooks.com\/?p=58"},"modified":"2016-09-02T16:54:52","modified_gmt":"2016-09-02T16:54:52","slug":"choicest-cuts-bleak-house-part-two","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/bumbleberry.marketing\/nl\/2013\/12\/02\/choicest-cuts-bleak-house-part-two\/","title":{"rendered":"Choicest Cuts: Bleak House (Part Two)"},"content":{"rendered":"

After the previous episode<\/a>, it\u2019s time to look at some more quotes from Bleak House and see how you can use them to inspire you in your own writing.<\/p>\n

Reminiscing Characters<\/h3>\n
\n

\u201cA family home,\u201d he ruminates as he marches along, \u201chowever small it is, makes a man like me look lonely. But it\u2019s well I never made that evolution of matrimony. I shouldn\u2019t have been fit for it. I am such a vagabond still, even at my present time of life, that I couldn\u2019t hold to the gallery a month together if it was a regular pursuit or if I didn\u2019t camp there, gipsy fashion. Come! I disgrace nobody and cumber nobody; that\u2019s something. I have not done that for many a long year!\u201d So he whistles it off and marches on.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Whether you\u2019re a bachelor by choice, a eunuch for the sake of the Kingdom of Heaven or just waiting for that special someone, these feelings are probably familiar to you. Some people are just born to be single their whole life, and while they may have feelings like these, there\u2019s nothing wrong with being single or having these thoughts. In fictional characters, it adds realism, pathos. Give your characters an extra dimension, and don\u2019t be afraid to have them ruminate on some deeper things, even if they\u2019re usually of the happy-go-lucky sort.
\n<\/em><\/p>\n

Candlestick-wards<\/h3>\n

This comes in the category of inventing your own words.<\/p>\n

\n

Miss Volumnia rising with a look candlestick-wards,<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Candlestick-wards. It\u2019s a word that doesn\u2019t exist, yet you instantly know what it means, and you feel it really should have existed long before. Don\u2019t be afraid to play around with words and combining parts of existing words if necessary. Just as long as it\u2019s clear what you mean.<\/p>\n

Hilariously Distracted<\/h3>\n
\n

\u201cThank your ladyship,\u201d says Mr. Guppy; \u201cquite satisfactory. Now\u2014I\u2014dash it!\u2014The fact is that I put down a head or two here of the order of the points I thought of touching upon, and they\u2019re written short, and I can\u2019t quite make out what they mean. If your ladyship will excuse me taking it to the window half a moment, I\u2014\u201d Mr. Guppy, going to the window, tumbles into a pair of love-birds, to whom he says in his confusion, \u201cI beg your pardon, I am sure.\u201d This does not tend to the greater legibility of his notes. He murmurs, growing warm and red and holding the slip of paper now close to his eyes, now a long way off, \u201cC.S. What\u2019s C.S. for? Oh! C.S.! Oh, I know! Yes, to be sure!\u201d And comes back enlightened.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

This is just another way of making your characters feel more real. This Mr Guppy is having quite a hard time making sense of his own notes, a feeling that\u2019s added to by the circumstances surrounding his meeting with her ladyship. Dickens masterfully paints Guppy\u2019s confusion here by not only having him stammer and moving about nervously, but also having him walk into some birds and actually apologizing to them. I\u2019m sure most, if not all of us, have at some point walked into something, even an inanimate object perhaps, and apologized when there was really no need to. It\u2019s what humans do. Human beings can be awfully silly at times, so there\u2019s really no need to exclude every single trace of silliness from our writing, as if the transfer to a page turns people into perfect robotic Hollywood actors.<\/p>\n

Pain for Bones<\/h3>\n

Consider this bit of fantastic writing, as an ill boy describes his own symptoms:<\/p>\n

\n

\u201cI\u2019m a-being froze,\u201d returned the boy hoarsely, with his haggard gaze wandering about me, \u201cand then burnt up, and then froze, and then burnt up, ever so many times in a hour. And my head\u2019s all sleepy, and all a-going mad-like\u2014and I\u2019m so dry\u2014and my bones isn\u2019t half so much bones as pain.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

The whole first part of this already manages to capture so well the sort of feelings ill people may go through. Fever can do strange things to a body, not to mention to a mind, and that\u2019s all noted here. But the real clincher comes at the end: \u201cmy bones isn\u2019t half so much bones as pain.\u201d It\u2019s tragic, really, for the person feeling this, but man, what an interesting way of putting it. People, no matter how sick they are, can still have moments where they\u2019re so lucid that they might say truly brilliant things. Perhaps being ill has their minds more focused. In any case, it\u2019s a really good metaphor. \u00a0Do think out of the box when it comes to metaphors, and try to get into your characters\u2019 minds, see what sort of things they would say. If they\u2019re ill, think back to when you were ill, whether you were in a hospital bed before or after surgery, or at home, lying on the couch with a cold.<\/p>\n

Embrace Controversy<\/h3>\n
\n

\u201cNow, is it not a horrible reflection,\u201d said my guardian, to whom I had hastily explained the unavailing efforts of the two women, \u201cis it not a horrible reflection,\u201d walking up and down and rumpling his hair, \u201cthat if this wretched creature were a convicted prisoner, his hospital would be wide open to him, and he would be as well taken care of as any sick boy in the kingdom?\u201d \u201cMy dear Jarndyce,\u201d returned Mr. Skimpole, \u201cyou\u2019ll pardon the simplicity of the question, coming as it does from a creature who is perfectly simple in worldly matters, but why ISN\u2019T he a prisoner then?\u201d My guardian stopped and looked at him with a whimsical mixture of amusement and indignation in his face. \u201cOur young friend is not to be suspected of any delicacy, I should imagine,\u201d said Mr. Skimpole, unabashed and candid. \u201cIt seems to me that it would be wiser, as well as in a certain kind of way more respectable, if he showed some misdirected energy that got him into prison. There would be more of an adventurous spirit in it, and consequently more of a certain sort of poetry.\u201d<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Oh my\u2026 that Mr Skimpole\u2026 did he really say that? How shocking!<\/p>\n

And you know what\u2019s most shocking about this? Not the fact that he actually said it, but that sometimes, some of us actually think shocking thoughts, and we shock ourselves while we\u2019re at it. Indeed, we try to immediately banish those thoughts from our minds, perhaps even pray for forgiveness, but the truth is, people think and say controversial things all the time. We, as writers, shouldn\u2019t be afraid to show that. We do need to pay attention to how we show it, in what light. If, like me, you believe writers should show what\u2019s morally good (and that in itself is a hugely controversial opinion, I am aware of it), you need to be careful about how to frame these controversial thoughts and sayings. Just don\u2019t avoid controversy altogether, because then you might as well not write at all.<\/p>\n

A Hundred O\u2019Clock<\/h3>\n

(I hope I got the capitalization in this subtitle right, by the by.) \u2026parenthetical asides aside, let\u2019s just look at this hilarious expression:<\/p>\n

\n

\u201cWhy, I said about ten.\u201d \u201cYou said about ten,\u201d Tony repeats. \u201cYes, so you did say about ten. But according to my count, it\u2019s ten times ten\u2014it\u2019s a hundred o\u2019clock.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Isn\u2019t that just priceless? I\u2019m tempted to use this in real life. \u201cUh, didn\u2019t we have an appointment at eleven? It\u2019s more like eleventy-one o\u2019clock now!\u201d Okay, so I\u2019m not as funny as Dickens\u2026 but then, few people are, I\u2019m sure.<\/p>\n

He said, she said<\/h3>\n

There are people who say you should exclusively\u00a0<\/i>use \u201csaid\u201d in dialogue tags. Those people are dead wrong, as this fine bit of writing shows:<\/p>\n

\n

To which Mr. Weevle returns, \u201cWilliam, I should have thought it would have been a lesson to YOU never to conspire any more as long as you lived.\u201d To which Mr. Guppy says, \u201cWho\u2019s conspiring?\u201d To which Mr. Jobling replies, \u201cWhy, YOU are!\u201d To which Mr. Guppy retorts, \u201cNo, I am not.\u201d To which Mr. Jobling retorts again, \u201cYes, you are!\u201d To which Mr. Guppy retorts, \u201cWho says so?\u201d To which Mr. Jobling retorts, \u201cI say so!\u201d To which Mr. Guppy retorts, \u201cOh, indeed?\u201d To which Mr. Jobling retorts, \u201cYes, indeed!\u201d And both being now in a heated state, they walk on silently for a while to cool down again.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

There\u2019s a lovely rhythm here, and using \u201csays\u201d would just kill it. Sure, don\u2019t overuse words like \u201cexclaimed\u201d, \u201cwhispered\u201d, \u201cejaculated\u201d and what have you, but you don\u2019t have to stick to just one word if you don\u2019t want to. That\u2019d be like a painter painting with just one colour.<\/p>\n

Throwing People<\/h3>\n
\n

Mrs. Smallweed instantly begins to shake her head and pipe up, \u201cSeventy-six pound seven and sevenpence! Seventy-six thousand bags of money! Seventy-six hundred thousand million of parcels of bank-notes!\u201d \u201cWill somebody give me a quart pot?\u201d exclaims her exasperated husband, looking helplessly about him and finding no missile within his reach. \u201cWill somebody obleege me with a spittoon? Will somebody hand me anything hard and bruising to pelt at her? You hag, you cat, you dog, you brimstone barker!\u201d Here Mr. Smallweed, wrought up to the highest pitch by his own eloquence, actually throws Judy at her grandmother in default of anything else, by butting that young virgin at the old lady with such force as he can muster and then dropping into his chair in a heap.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

Okay, this needs a bit of context. Just a bit. Mr Smallweed has this thing where, whenever his wife mentions money, he gets all nervous and throws something at her, usually a cushion. That\u2019s at home, though. When in a carriage, like here, without anything suitable to throw, you just reach for the first thing you might use as a missile. Judy, in this case.<\/p>\n

It\u2019s a great running joke throughout the book, and there are two lessons for you here. One, include running gags in your books. Two, if you\u2019re writing comedy, nothing\u2019s too bizarre. Not even having old geezers throw young ladies at their wives.<\/p>\n

Ouch!<\/h3>\n
\n

I said it was not the custom in England to confer titles on men distinguished by peaceful services, however good and great, unless occasionally when they consisted of the accumulation of some very large amount of money.<\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n

See, writing is not for the faint-hearted. Sometimes you just feel like writing about something in society that frustrates you. Don\u2019t resist that urge, because there are plenty of other people out there thinking the same thing. Sometimes they\u2019re just waiting for, and in need of, a confirmation of their thoughts in writing.<\/p>\n

Hopefully you\u2019ve got some good ideas for your own writing. If so, don\u2019t thank me, thanks Mr Dickens. And please join me next time, for the final part of the first instalment of Choicest Cuts.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

After the previous episode, it\u2019s time to look at some more quotes from Bleak House and see how you can use them to inspire you in your own writing. Reminiscing Characters \u201cA family home,\u201d he ruminates as he marches along, \u201chowever small it is, makes a man like me look lonely. But it\u2019s well I 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